Listen, my son, and be wise, And direct your heart in the way. Proverbs 23:19
There are some very serious consequences for those who become heavy drinkers or gluttonous eaters. These are things that we don't like to deal with today - because they tend to get a little personal when we confront them. Nevertheless, these things are not good for us, and they will rob us of the blessings of a good and prosperous life. Contrary to the nanny state that is trying to change people's behavior by legislation and shaming, God's Word takes a different approach. First of all, we see that the things that are being said are said from the mouth of a father. These are matters that the state are not to fix - they were meant to be addressed in the course of living within a godly home. The reason that these things are epidemic in our day is because of the rampant lack of godly homes. There are no longer fathers who take the time to regularly teach and train their sons to be godly men. There are also no longer those in our society that will know the Word in a way that will move them to impart wisdom to their children. The father here speaks to his son and lets him know from the start that the motivation for his comments is that his son would be wise. He is saying to his boy, if you are wise, you will avoid these kinds of lifestyle choices. Then he lets his son know that if he rejects such wisdom - there will be consequences. He does not seek to deliver his son from the consequences except a warning of what is to come. He is not wanting to just modify his son's behavior. He is seeking to help his son on heart issues. He says, "Direct your heart in the way!" Our current legislative overreach wants to modify behavior by taxing certain behaviors heavier - or trying to outlaw them altogether. They seek to stop smoking this way - or they try to so stigmatize smoking that people will stop out of shame. What this has led to is people who hold fast to their smoking - but not have to pay far more to do so. The sad thing is that in the end, the government (who is constantly in search of more money to spend) receives greater tax because of this behavior. This makes it to where they almost don't want to have smoking stop - because then their revenue stream will dry up and go away. Just addressing the outward behavior will do little or nothing to stop the problem. This father addresses the heart. He wants his son to be wise - and a wise man takes the time to direct his own heart into a way that does not dishonor God. He will direct his heart into ways that are not destructive to himself. Instead he will direct his heart into "THE" way. What is "THE" way? It is the way of the Lord. It is a way that puts great value on bringing glory and honor and praise to Him. It is a way that values the Word of God - and values the lifestyle that comes from honoring and obeying the Word of God. This is what the father wants - and it is a wise thing that he is seeking! Fathers, let's give us merely trying to change our son's behavior with poor motivators. Threats and harsh punishments will probably not turn the hearts of our sons to the right way. Let us speak the truth to our children, but at the same time aim for the heart. What we want is to see them choose wise paths - and heart-motivated change. May God give us the wisdom to speak to them this way - and then they will be blessed - not just with good behavior, but a good heart that motivates that behavior for a lifetime. Check tomorrow's post as we continue through the next several verses to see how the father uses wisdom - and an understanding of the biblical consequences that follow our actions.
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My son, if your heart is wise, My own heart also will be glad; and my inmost being will rejoice When your lips speak what is right. Proverbs 23:15-16
What should matter most to us when we think of our sons? I know for a period of my life what mattered most to me was seeing my sons excel at sports. I could have sadly rewritten these two verses with the following foolish edits. "My son, if you do well at football and soccer, my own heart also will be glad; and my flesh will rejoice when I can cheer at your games for your goals and touchdowns." (Dopey Father 23:15-16) First of all I want to state that I am not against sports or competitive activities. When God graciously broke me he still allowed my sons to compete in sports - and I continued to cheer for them on the sidelines. Oh, but how I grieved for the years that I had lost - and for the way I had skewed their minds on what was a priority in their lives. During that time period we set everything aside for their sports careers. We spent tremendous amounts of money following them all over the mid-south (which, by the way, put us into debt). I had my sweet wife miss church along with my sons, so that we could go wherever the coach told us to go. We basically had a very clear idol in our lives - and it is was the dream I had that maybe one day my sons could play college ball - or even make a pro team. But the most devastating problem that was growing all the time was the misplaced priorities that I was putting before my sons. My own lack of submission to the Lordship of Jesus Christ in my life - carried over into my son's lives. This story ends well - because of two things. First and foremost because of God's mercy and grace. But secondly, because of some serious repentance on my part - repentance and brokenness that led me back to a proper life under the Lordship of Jesus Christ - and with proper biblical priorities. Let me get back, though, to the proverb at hand. The father here is speaking of what makes his heart glad. The father here was glad, and later even rejoiced that his son had a wise heart. Wisdom was what this father valued most in his son. And it is a wisdom that sees life as God sees it. The father here lived to see his son one day with a very wise and discerning heart. He labored to see that one day his boy would be a man who longed to do the will of God above anything else in his life. This places before us a very important question. Are we as fathers seeing our most important job as laboring to see our sons become wise, godly young men? Wisdom comes from God. We learned this back in Proverbs 2. If we are going to have wise sons, it will be because we have taught them the things of God. Wise sons come from wise fathers who both know the Word and apply it in our everyday lives. The passion that often drives a "sports-dad" will be re-directed into being a "godly-dad." If the Christian fathers who spend hours trying to hone their son into the next Peyton Manning or the next Landon Donovan, would devote that much time to honing their sons into the next Paul - we'd watch a revolution in the church - and in our society in general. Instead of working on passing and catching skills alone - we'd find ourselves spending time also reading the Word with our child. We'd be working on wisdom skills - on memorizing Scripture - and on being able to take the Word of God an use it to properly discern good and evil as they walked through their lives. I know I may be laboring the point a little bit, but think about this for a moment. How many sons are actually going to be playing sports at the college level? How many truly have a shot at the NFL or MLB or the MLS? And how many who make it to those levels of sport will have a wise and discerning heart there to keep them out of the trouble that seems to be following sportsmen in these sports? The truth is very few will make it to these teams, but everyone single one of those young men will need to be able to live a life of wisdom. All of them - even those who do make it - will need "wisdom skills" to walk through life worthy of their calling in Jesus Christ. If you think your son will make it to a college or pro level - have at it. But Dad, make sure that the most important goal you have for your son is to live a life of wisdom an godliness! Make sure HE knows that this is the true goal - and that which would most delight your heart and soul! The father her also states that his inmost being will rejoice when he hears his son speaking what is right. The inmost being spoken of here is literally kidneys in the Hebrew. Dads, your kidneys need to rejoice over your son! Now there is a phrase you don't hear much anymore. "Hey Bob, man my kidneys just rejoice over how Bob Jr. is growing into a godly young man!" The kidneys were thought, along with the heart, to be the deepest seat of emotion and joy in a person. It referred to the innermost and most private part of a person's life. When you are moved to rejoice at that level, you are rejoicing at the deepest level possible. You rejoice because your heart is blessed at the core level of your beliefs and principles. This leaves me with another loaded question. What is your deepest rejoicing about in life? If you find yourself rejoicing deeply at the touchdowns and sports achievements of others - but yawning at the things of God - the exhibition of godly character and true manhood - you are rejoicing about the wrong things. Let me say, I love a good touchdown like most guys - but God has worked to where I get more excited when I watch my sons make godly decisions. The reason this father was rejoicing in his kidneys was because his son was speaking what is right. This is not that his son was parroting some phrase or some rote speech he knew would make dad happy, but that his son was speaking normally - and was saying what was right. This is an important step for our sons maturity wise. Jesus taught us that it was out of the abundance of the heart that the mouth spoke. So when we hear our sons speaking what is right in their normal conversation - it tells us that God has worked in their hearts. It is easy to get a son to say what YOU want him too when he is around you - but it is far more difficult to rear him to say the right thing (the godly thing) as a matter of normal living. This requires God working in his heart. That is why the father was dancing in his kidneys when he knew his son was speaking this way. Fathers, this proverb is vital for us to grasp. We are called to take boys given to us by God, and rear them to be men. This requires doing far more than just bringing home the bacon - and re-living our desires for sports grandeur through them. Taking a boy and making him a man requires that we put wisdom and godliness at the top of our own priority list, and helping our sons to do the same. It means laboring to see a heart-change in our boys by the working of the gospel and the Spirit of God. It means training our sons to love a woman properly - and to have a vision of what God desires for their lives to be. But I will tell you by the mercies of God that when you watch your sons begin to make godly decisions - no sports achievement in the world can come close to the sensation you will get in your kidneys! Live therefore for the glory of God and the blessing of your kidneys as you labor to take boys - and give the world men of God. Apply your heart to discipline And your ears to words of knowledge. Proverbs 23:12
This is a simple admonition here in Proverbs - and yet if we will look at it carefully, it will yield to us some very helpful information. The first thing we see is that we are to apply our heart to discipline. The word "apply" here means, "to bring to" - thus what God is saying to us is that we need to bring our hearts to something. Here we read that what we bring our hearts to is discipline. The word discipline is "musar" which means to instruct with discipline. It refers most often to the discipline given by a father - both by word and by the rod. It is very easy when discipline is applied to us for us to not allow it to reach the heart. We may hear the words - and receive the correction - but we do not bring our hearts to it. True correction and discipline is for the heart - not the bottom. It might be applied to the rear end with the rod - but the aim in these things needs to be directly to the heart. Those who protest the use of the rod see the issue being striking a child - and they see it as evil in all circumstances. But the godly parent is not aiming for the rear end alone. They want to instruct with their discipline. They want their words and their use of the rod to affect the heart of the child. If you have their heart - in the end you will truly change their behavior. What Solomon is saying though, is for the one receiving the discipline. Apply your heart to what God is trying to teach you. If you are like me - there are times when you bristle at discipline. It is not pleasant to have God apply the rod to us. It is not a delightful thing for us to be corrected and rebuked. But when God grants us discipline it is only for our best interests. We can be absolutely assured of this. Therefore we need to train ourselves to receive it joyfully - gratefully - and educationally. If we do, maybe we won't need a second dose of discipline to complete the job for us. The second admonition here is that we also apply our ears to words of knowledge. Knowledge here refers to more than just head-learning. Solomon is telling us about a knowing of God and His ways. He refers to a working knowledge - a practical knowledge - intimate knowledge - knowledge that truly changes the way we act. The verb "apply" is assumed here - thus we are told to bring our ears to this knowledge that God is seeking to give us. It is more than just hearing it - it is concentrated listening. It is listening to learn and to apply it to one's life. This is key to us becoming wise. If we will truly bring our hearts and ears to what God is seeking to communicate to us, we will be blessed greatly. God longs for us to be wise and to know and follow Him with all our hearts. These two practices - bringing our hearts to times of discipline - and bringing our ears to hear obediently what God says to us - will assure that we grow and personally experience all the godliness that God desires to give us when He works and speaks in our lives. POSTSCRIPT: Recently, individuals have quoted articles from this section and stated that we teach child abuse at Calvary Chapel Jonesboro. To this I feel the need to respond. First, biblically, we are told that if we have a problem with our brother to go to our brother - not the internet - and confront our brother. To date, these individuals have yet to contact me to discuss these things. That should say volumes in itself. Second, we do not teach child abuse at our fellowship. This blog is an endeavor to teach what is in the Bible for the edification and upbuilding of God's people. Anyone who has been to our fellowship knows that in our classrooms we administer NO physical discipline. We correct with words and with "time outs" and eventually with a report to parents. From our nursery throughout every age group our people are instructed NEVER to administer physical discipline. We believe this right alone belongs to a parent. Even then we teach the following about any application of physical discipline. Discipline is about the heart of a child. Physical or corporal punishment is ONLY to be administered in a spirit of love for the child. Teaching and loving verbal correction is key - as is prayer for the child's eventual salvation in Jesus Christ. Any physical punishment administered due to anger or rage is out of line and wrong. The parent is to discipline the child with appropriate discipline - not abuse. In the end the child should be taught - and in every circumstance hugged, loved, and prayed with after any physical punishment to assure them of our love. The idea of a "beating" is completely out of step with what the Scriptures are teaching. Instead the idea of loving discipline is intended. Do not speak in the hearing of a fool, For he will despise the wisdom of your words. Proverbs 23:9
There are people in life that you cannot speak to or teach. That is one of the irrefutable facts of life that you need to realize and embrace . . . or go crazy. Proverbs addresses this fact today. The fool is a dull, thickheaded, stubborn person who will not welcome or allow God's wisdom into his life. Proverbs 1:7 reminds us that fools despise wisdom and instruction. Three different words are translated fool in the Old Testament, and none of them are particularly flattering to the one who is a fool. The first is the Hebrew word "kesl" which speaks of someone who is spiritually dull and characterized by a mind closed to God and His Word. He is thickheaded and very stubborn in holding to his own ways, his own thoughts, and his own ideas. This person will usually reject information from others - and is especially beligerent toward information from God. This is the word used most often for fool throughout the book of Proverbs - and is the word used here. The second word for fool is "nabal" which refers to one who lacks any kind of spiritual perception or discernment. The third word for fool is "ewl" and speaks of the one who is arrogant, flippant, and mentally dull. he is also hardened in his ways and unwilling to change in response to information from others - and once again even more so when it comes to information from the Word or the Spirit of God. This is the person to whom you are speaking - who is either hearing you speak directly to him - or indirectly hears what you are saying. We need to see here that we are not even to speak in the "hearing" of a fool. This guy will not listen - his mind is closed to the things of God - and thus his ears are too. He is settled in his ungodly and worldly thinking. He will not just reject your words - he will despise them. The word despise is the Hebrew "buz" and means to hold in contempt and utter disrespect. What we have said here in Proverbs 23:9 is the same as we read in chatper 1 verse 7. They hate the wisdom of God. This probably sounds harsh to some who read this and react with the template of being tolerant of everyone's views. The problem though is not with the person who knows and loves God's wisdom - it is with the fool who is anything but tolerant of God's views. It is so important that we remember that God's wisdom is simply seeing things from God's perspective. We learn to look at things the way that God looks at them. We want to have His mindset and His heart. But when the fool hears these things - he reacts with disgust - even hatred! He wants NOTHING to do with God's Word or His ways. We see this in our society more and more. Those who are unsaved are becoming more and more hardened in their ways. They accuse us of intolerance - and yet as we love them and share the truth with them - it is they who are the intolerant. It is not that they just disagree with us - they want our views labelled as "hate speech" and forbidden from public discourse. They radically and hatefully respond to our views of morality - and see them as an afront to their very existance. Therefore when we speak - they will react strongly to us. Some will even become so angry that they will attempt to shout us down or shut us down. Others will go as far as taking our views to court to see them labelled as illegal. Thus they not only reject them - they reject having them spoken out loud even when they are not present. So how do we deal with this? First, we do what Proverbs says. We realize a fool when we run into one - and we don't speak in their hearing. It is not that we hide from them or take our message underground. We just simply speak to others instead of them. This is a tricky thing to manage, because we don't want to refuse the gospel to people. Paul was very harsh toward Christians before he was saved - yet the Lord wanted him to hear the gospel. Some who persectued the church - came to Christ simply because those persectured shared their faith with them. So, we approach this with wisdom and the leadership of the Spirit - not just our own tendency to react to the more strident in their views among the wicked. This being said, we do exercise wisdom and share with those who receive the message. To do otherwise would be to waste the message with those who will reject it outright. Even Jesus told us not to throw the pearls of the gospel before swine. He said that they would trample them under foot and turn to attack us. Kinda sounds like what Solomon is seeking to tell us here. So be wise - share the gospel and the wisdom of God freely - but be wise with those who reject it violently. Share with those who have a heart to hear - a heart where God is granting them ears to hear and a heart to respond to the Spirit's moving. They won't despise the Word or the wisdom of God. They will embrace it and prove it by the change that they experience in their lives. Proverbs 23:6-8 (NASB)
6 Do not eat the bread of a selfish man, Or desire his delicacies; 7 For as he thinks within himself, so he is. He says to you, "Eat and drink!" But his heart is not with you. 8 You will vomit up the morsel you have eaten, And waste your compliments. Proverbs lays out for us here three verses that warn us of selfish and greedy men. The term used to describe this men is a man of an 'evil eye.' This term is a Hebraism that refers to a man whose eye is set in a way that he is covetous and very selfish when it comes to his money. This guy has evidently made a promise of a sumptuous meal. To break bread with someone in this day was to offer them a meal. And from what we read here - this man is putting quite a the spread before us. It does not only involve putting food before us - but delicacies. Delicacies here is the Hebrew word "mat'am" and it means a very tasty, delicious food. It indicates soemthing like gourmet food or special tidbits and delicacies that were usually only served to the wealthy and influential person. This meal is provided to catch our eye - but dull our sensest. This is not just a Big Mac at Mickie-D's. This would be an entire meal at a fancy restaurant - including a top shelf dessert as well. Why would this man do this? What is even more important though is that God warns us to stay away - and not eat it - and not to be drawn in by the delicacies! We are warned against the desires that arise in us as we look at te delicacies set before us. Again, one might ask, "Why?" The answer lies with the character and the motives of the man who is providing the meal. He has a reason for what He is doing. And according to this passage - his motives are evil, selfish, and self-centered. Let's look a little further at all this as we seek to get all we can from this warning - as well as how all this applies to what we can face from men in THIS generation that use the same tactics. God now reveals to us this man's heart. The motives of his heart are hidden from us and the only way we know them is when God reveals them to us. This man thinks within himself differently than he is acting outwardly. His outward words say, "Eat and drink!" There is every indication that he is all about his hospitality. There is a problem though. His words do not match his heart. Who he is in his heart is who he really is and since his heart is not with us, we should question his true motives. Why would someone provide a great spread like this - and not have their heart in it? The answer to this question is that greed and selfishness are what motivate him. Ever been to a "free meal" or a "free weekend" at a time share? Yeah . . . that's what we're talking about here. We are provided what seems like an innocent and wonderful gift. Problem is the entire time we are enjoying it we are being set up for the real purpose. The gift is given to get something from us! Before the night is over - before the weekend is over - there is going to be a presentation. The reason for all the generosity is that you are supposed to buy something - commit to something. I've been to a free weekend at a resort - and the term "high pressure sales" is an understatement of what I eventually faced. When my "free" weekend was over, I honestly wished I had just paid for my so-called free vacation. That was one of the longest three hours of my entire life. When someone's heart is not with you in providing that great meal or that wonderful weekend; when someone's heart is not with you in giving you those "free tickets" or that gift card for a free meal, you need to know that a the heart is not set on giving, but greed. You are being lured into a way for Mr. Generous to make money in the end. We are told that we will vomit up the morsel we thought we enjoyed. There will be a disgust in our hearts when we eat this man's food. That disgust will only be experienced after we find out the real agenda here. He didn't do this for us . . . He did it for himself. Covetousness and profiteering were the real reason this for Mr. Generosity's gift. In the end you feel like a fool for being tricked into doing something you "normally" would not do. You curse your desires that deadened you to the warnings of the Holy Spirit. Remember my time share story? Oh, how embarassingly this ended. I told myself that I would not buy anything! I was going to be strong - and say NO to everything. Then I'd enjoy the rest of my free vacation and go home. Remember the "high-pressure sales pitch?" Well, in the end, we didn't buy a time share. Instead we paid a ridiculous price for a promised "future" vacation - actually three were promised. I'm not stupid enough to fall for just one! Of course the promised triple play did not quite work out like it was mapped out for us. In fact the entire sitaution was a debacle. In the end - I vomited out the vacation we took - and wished I could take back my compliments about what a "great deal" I had just gotten! Remember this . . . when a selfish, greedy man "gives" you something, he has every intention to more than double or triple what he invested. At least that is my story - and my savings (or lack thereof) is sticking to it! In the end - you feel like a fool for complimenting the generosity of your host. You look at what was provided - and you think that it is wonderful. But the cost in the end - oh the cost in the end - makes you feel like a complete idiot for ever accepting his invitation. You kick yourself for ever getting involved. There are plenty of evil-eyed men out there in the world. They have their plans and their purpose for their pseudo-generosity. But remember that we've been warned by a wise God - and a wise man who walked with God - that there are subversive plans in this pseudo-generosity. The plans of these heartless givers are laid out like a trap for the unwary and the unsuspecting to step into. They want to catch your eye with their delicacies - and keep you from seeing the long-term plan in their ruse of free provision. Believe me when I say that their intention is to make far more than they have given. The truly wise man will see this ahead of time - and avoid even a meal provided by one whose eye is evil - and whose plans are selfish and filled with snares. Do not move the ancient boundary Or go into the fields of the fatherless, 11 For their Redeemer is strong; He will plead their case against you. Proverbs 23:10-11
There is something about the orphan, the fatherless in this world that moves God's heart. Those who seek to bless the widow and the orphan God pronounces as blessed - while here we receive a warning - a dire warning against doing things that harm them. The first thing we read is not move the ancient boundary. What is this about? In biblical times these were markings that helped people know where their fields ended and where others began. People would move boundary stones when plowing their fields - so that they could steal land from their neighbors by doing so. Here this is equated with going into the fields of the orphan - stealing from orphans for your own greed. God reserved some of His strongest language for those who would do such things. The heaviest curses were reserved for this kind of sin. We are warned that the One who is the Redeemer for these orphans is strong - in this case strong enough to be considered omnipotent. Only a fool would take on Someone with omnipotence. This Strong One, Jehovah Himself, will take up the case of the orphan and will plead their case against your greed and godlessness. The best wisdom from the Word of God is not to mess with orphans - unless you either are going to bless them - or face a fate that is sure and deadly. But back to this boundary stone - how can we move boundary stones in our day? With current technology involving GPS systems - that kind of sin is just about obsolete in our day. But there are many kinds of boundary stones in life. There are those related to land and agriculture. But there are also boundary markers when it comes to morals and to theological matters. Pity the man or men who decide they want to move things morally or theologically away from where God Himself has set those markers. This is not really a new sin - because men have been doing it for years. They also have been paying a horrible price for it as well. Back in 1973 we, as a nation, decided to move an ancient boundary marker and declare open season on the unborn. In 1967 we decided to move the boundary marker concerning prayer and bible reading in our schools. The results have been disastrous. In our current day our government is decided to remove the marker altogether concerning immorality, sexuality, and marriage. It is truly unwise to move that boundary - as unwise as messing with orphans. Yet men continue to do so - to their own destruction and the destruction of entire nations. Just as a fool is the only one who would take on an omnipotent God in messing with orphans - so also it is only a fool who decides to stand against God Himself by moving the moral boundaries that God Himself has set. We've done it . . . but then again we continue to pay for it every day. The God of those boundaries is truly strong - and for every boundary we seek to push backward - there will be a price. Are we willing to continue to pay it? Do not weary yourself to gain wealth, Cease from your consideration of it. 5 When you set your eyes on it, it is gone. For wealth certainly makes itself wings Like an eagle that flies toward the heavens. Proverbs 23:4-5
God is not against people becoming wealthy. There are people in the history of the Bible who became wealthy because of God's specific blessing upon them. So God is not "anti-wealth" as some people would suppose. But, He is concerned with how people view money and wealth - and to be more specific how they pursue it. That is where the real danger lies. Don't weary yourself to gain wealth. There is the first principle God puts before us. The word weary means to become weary with work. It indicates that the person is putting forth great effort and exhausting exertion to try to accomplish something. It should probably be noted here that God is for hard work. He wants us to work hard at the things we do. He wants us to offer excellence and effort to our jobs and in the things we do for Him and for others. The Lord is not encouraging laziness here. He is saying that those who put forth exhausting labor with the ultimate goal being to become wealthy are focusing on the wrong goal. I remember working at UPS in Seminary and watching one of my supervisors live this way. His goal in life was to work so hard when he is young, that he could retire when he was 45 as a millionaire. This poor guy was always at work. He had a wife and a couple of kids - but from the way he spoke of them to us - they were just obstacles to him getting where he wanted to go. I've watched men like this who labor so hard to become rich. They reach their goal - but find out that the loss of their marriage and the fact that their kids have no respect for them - costs far more than the millions they have to spend in their old age. Proverbs tells us next that we are to cease from our consideraton of becoming wealthy. An interesting word is used for "consideration" here. It means to think hard about something. The result of this thinking should be a proper discernment of it. But according to what is being said here God is warning us against making wealth the thing we consider and think hard about in life. There are those who constantly chase the illusive goal of being rich. They read books about it - they listen to tapes that promise them the way to get there - they listen to radio shows that promise them that if they do what this man says - they'll be rich. There is even a "chrisitanized" version of this thinking. The health/wealth/prosperity teaching promises that God Himself is nothing but a divine sugar daddy. If we treat Him right - and confess the right things - we'll be rich! Wonder how that works for persecuted Christians behind the bamboo curtain who are in jail for their faith. If they confess the right words and really have faith, they'll get twice the gruel that their cellmate receives? God wants us to have our minds fixed on other things than our own financial bottom line. If we truly had discernment we'd know that our bank account will matter only in how we used it for God's glory. Our "consideration" should be of the Lord Himself and what His will is for us in life. To have a constant consideration of wealth is to waste our minds on things that are not eternal. There is another reason we should not be chasing wealth. That reason is that wealth is often illusive. In the simplest terms - take the example of the guy buying lottery tickets thinking he is going to win and get rich. This proves two things - first, this guy is not very good at Math - and second, he is focused on the wrong things. He thinks that money will solve his problems. If he only took the time to study previous big winners of the lottery he'd learn that it usually causes more problems than it solves. Then there is the person who is chasing the illusive goal of inventing something that will make him rich. Too often the inventions don't pan out and the guy pursuing them for wealth winds up broke - and broken because of his failure to "make it to the big time." Wealth takes wings like an eagle -flying off into the heavens. What a picture for us to remember! This is true in so many ways. What was just covered is one of the ways that wealth takes wings - but there is another that is even more important for us to remember. Ask a rich man how much money he needs to be content. His answer will be, "Just a little more than I have now." That is the most deceptive part of wealth. When we "get there" to our stated goal - we'll find it is not enough to bring peace and satisfaction to us. So, we figure we'll set our goal a little higher - only to find that when we get there we still don't feel satisfied. Some folks spend their entire lives chasing the eagle as it soars higher and higher into the air. They die richer than they ever dreamed - but learning that the dream becomes a nightmare because of the lack of satisfaction in their wealth. One last thing needs to be said of a life spent chasing after wealth and riches. The ultimate bummer for the rich man is when he dies. He leaves everything behind. There are no "rich people" in heaven or hell. The basis of success or ultimate failure has to do with being able to stand before God in the judgment. Jesus tells the story of the rich farmer who has a bumper crop. He wonders what to do with his untold wealth. He finally decides that he will tear down his barns and build bigger ones. Then he will store his abundance and say to his soul that he has much wealth and can rest. Jesus' words here are frightening. He says, "You fool! Tonight your soul is required of you - and how will mere wealth help you?" We can be as wealthy as 10 Solomons - and still find ourselves eternally impoverished if we don't have forgiveness and salvation in Jesus Christ. We can chase wealth into the heavens like that eagle - only to find that iin the end the descent into infinite poverty lasts not a human lifetime - it lasts for all eternity. Here true wisdom - be rich toward God - that wealth will last beyond what can be stolen or rust away. When you sit down to dine with a ruler, Consider carefully what is before you, 2 And put a knife to your throat If you are a man of great appetite. 3 Do not desire his delicacies, For it is deceptive food. Proverbs 23:1-3
What should one do when invited to dinner by a person of influence and power? This is what the writer of Proverbs addresses in the first three verses of chapter 23. For many this would be the time to indulge themselves - live it up - you're eating with the ruler! But the counsel of Solomon is to consider what is before you. Let's look at reasons why we should be careful when we eat with a ruler or person of great authority. First, we should never go into any situation without our wits intact. It is very unwise to go anywhere without the wisdom of God. In the moment that you think it is perfectly safe and you do not need to be wise and judicious, you will find that this is the place the devil has set up for a major attack. Always consider what is before you - where you are - what is proper - and what is wise. Why is this the case when being invited by a ruler to dinner? First we need to consider just "who" is before us. That is the gist of what the writer of Proverbs is saying to us. A ruler is not in the habit of just inviting anyone to eat with him. There may be an ulterior motive in this meeting - a test that is set before you in addition to the food itself. Second, there is the realization that when you eat with a ruler you will probably have the finest of everything. There are those who after such a meal would immediately go out into the world and decide they are going to eat the same way. There are foods and drinks that are ridiculously priced simply because the rich and powerful want to be different from the rest of the world. I've seen restaurants that serve tiny little portions of food and yet charge outrageous prices - simply because poeple who are rich and who frequent that restaurant will pay the prices to do so. What a sad commentary on the pride of man this is - yet it happens. One thing you should consider is that you are NOT a ruler - and that though it will be cool to eat that way that evening - life will return to normal tomorrow. Though you eat with a ruler - and he thinks his food is best, truth does not rest with the ruler - but with God who created all things to enjoy. Finally, consider that often the fare of kings is usually indulgent. This is not the best food for you anyway. There are a multitude of stories where the king or ruler only ate delicacies -but in the end - his super-indulgent food unfortunately was his demise as diseases that come with such eating habits cut his life short. This is why verse 2 says that we should "put a knife to your throat if you are a man of great appetite." In layman's terms - don't make a pig of yourself. Don't let your appetite take over at this moment. Keep your wits about you as you sit and dine with him. It is unwise to let our appetites run loose in any situation. Remember, we are fallen and sinful. Our entire nature has been affected by sin. Thus to trust your own intense desires is to get yourself into a world of hurt in the long run. Thus . . . put a knife to your throat. Wow, what a strong statement. He doesn't say, "eat in moderation." He says, "Put a knife at your own throat." Remember dear one, that the farmer puts quite the buffet out for his pigs and cattle. They can eat to their heart's content thinking all is innocent. Yet the truth is that they are being fattened for the slaughter. Oh, how we need to consider such things when wanting to give ourselves to our own appetites. The third verse of this proverb tells us not to desire the delicacies of the king - because it is deceptive food. Here is the line where the rubber hits the road. This food is deceptive. It is not reality! The ruler and the one in authority eats much different than we do. If you don't think this is the case - look at the daily table that Solomon had put before him. That portion was tremendous. That is the reminder to keep before us at feasts. Enjoy them with wisdom guiding your mind and behavior, but do not think this is the norm - nor should you give yourself over to a pursuit of such a lifestyle. It is interesting to note that the following verses after these warn against the pursuit of wealth. A time of feasting is wonderful when it happens, and if you get the opportunity to dine with a ruler that is even more a blessing. But be careful and allow wisdom to guide your mind and heart as you do. There are dangers here as there are in anything you do. You may be sitting at a table where your actions are being judged. You also may be tempted to give yourself to an appetite that will mislead you. Finally, you may be led by your selfish desires to want a lifesytle exactly like the ruler with whom you dine. To do so would be foolish and would plunge you into a pursuit that is outside the will of God for your life. I know it sounds severe - but put that knife to your own throat as you do so. It will help you enjoy what is before you - and when you leave - you will still have your heart and your wits about you as you return to much more standard fare of those who are everyday people. Give me your heart, my son, And let your eyes delight in my ways. For a harlot is a deep pit And an adulterous woman is a narrow well. Surely she lurks as a robber, And increases the faithless among men. Proverbs 23:26-28
Why should a man ask for the hearts of his children - especially the hearts of his sons? That is a good question because in our day we are told that our children need to think for themselves - which is true. The problem comes when that statement is made meaning that they should throw off the beliefs and morals of their parents and adopt the foolish morals of society itself. That is not wisdom but the height of foolishness. From what is said here by the Lord in verses 26-28 we will see why this is such a bad thing for the sons of a society to do. The plea of the father is simple - he wants to have his son's heart. He asks for it very plainly - and restates his request so that we understand that for which he asks. He wants his son to delight in his ways. The request is that his son sets or places his heart in the hands of his father. The restatement of that request lets us see that the father desires for his son to adopt and take up his ways. But this is not a request for the son to grudgingly take up his father's ways - but rather that the son would "delight" in them. "Ratsah" is delight and it means to accept something favorably - to be pleased with it. The father desires for his son to enjoy and favor the ways that he teaches him. This is nothing more than passing to our son the same way we live - to pass our morals and our beliefs to them. And we will see in the very next verse why this is important. Whose job is it to pass to the next generation the things of God and the ways of the Lord? It is the job of the father to do this - and if the father does not take this task seriously - the problems of this passage will riase their ugly head in any society. When a son does not delight in the godly ways of a godly father, what results is that the desires of his lower nature take over and head in a hell-ward direction. One of the first things that will show itself is the lusts of his flesh. Granted this is a two way street - for the one he is warned of is the harlot - the immoral woman. The truth is that without the influence of godly fathers, the daughters also turn away from the things of the Lord - and find that their fallen nature takes over in their choices as well. The son is warned that the harlot is a deep pit. In Proverbs 22:14 this deep pit is identified as the mouth and voice of the harlot and the prostitute. She lures one in with her words and with her enticing promises of sex that is beyond that which marital life can offer. The fool is the one who listens to her - draws near - and then falls into this deep pit. And for what reason is a deep pit dug other than to lure the unsuspecting animal near for the capture and the kill. The end of the matter is death and destruction. One finds himself lying broken in the bottom of the pit with no way out. so also is the adulterous one - who begins thinking only of pleasure and ends knowing nothing but guilt and destruction. The "adulterous" woman here is actually the "strange" or "foreign" woman. God warned against these women because of how they would tempt His people to leave Him and worship their foreign gods instead. Interesting is the fact that the vast majority of this alien worship involved sexual immorality and the abandonment of the marriage vow and the defilement of the marriage bed. This foreign or strange woman is described as a "narrow well." The word here for well is "beer" and it can mean either a well of refreshing water - or a narrow pit that only offers entrapment and misery. What I find fascinating about the use of this word is that God encourages us elsewhere in Proverbs to "drink water from your own well," in reference to the sexual relationship in marriage. But when we abandon our "own well," and go out into the streets seeking illicit sexual affairs - we move from our own well to a narrow pit that holds no water - but rather holds us in our sin and disgrace as the illicit sexual activity destroys our families and our marriages. While the foreign woman promises incredible sexual ecstacies to the fool she seeks to entice, the truth is that she is lurking like a predator, ready to pounce upon her unsuspecting prey. Just like the male black widow spider is lured to mate with the female - not realizing that she will destroy and consume him when the act is done - so the fool strolls into the den of the whore not fully seeing that this is not a pleasure den, but a robber's lure. Still, he comes, thinking that this is all about pleasure, when he is about to experience the trigger of the trap that will enslave him. He is about to have stolen from him all that he will truly treasure. This robber is waiting to add to her own lair of prey. She desires to increase the "faithless among men." This faithlessness is called "treachery" in the Old Testament. There is a word we don't seem to use as much any longer. This word means to act as a traitor and to betray someone. Here it refers to those who are married and their treachery toward their wives and toward the Lord before Whom they entered into their marriage vows. How many marriages have been destroyed simply because a man did not remember his vows before God - instead choosing to listen to the lies of his own flesh and the tantalizing lies of a strange woman. Oh, fathers, how we need to do two very valuable things in life. First, how we need to treasure our wives. We need first to SHOW the way to our sons by how we treat our wives and cling to them. You cannot have instruction without example - and in this situation how the world needs the example of godly fathers cherishing their wives in front of their children. Second, we need to have a generation of fathers who desperately want their son's hearts. We need to call to them to cherish the father-son relationship as a place where they can receive wisdom and instruction and warning. We need to love them and delight in them so that they continue to give their hearts to us. Then, when we have that marvelous gift of their hearts, we need to use that trust to teach them the things of the Lord - urging them to a lifestyle and to choices that will bless them for generations. Among these teachings is desperately needed a call to watch their own hearts - covet the strength of their own marriages - and to protect the purity of their marriage covenants before God. Do not let your heart envy sinners, But live in the fear of the Lord always. 18 Surely there is a future, And your hope will not be cut off. Proverbs 23:17-18
Ever look at the prosperity of sinners and the ungodly with the wrong set of eyes? Here's what I mean . . . it is difficult to miss the the wicked and ungodly are many times prosperous in this present world. It is also difficult to see sinners experiencing instant gratification for their sinning. Too often Christians want to keep this a secret - and not acknowledge such things. But the fact is that these things exist - and that we will have to see them as we walk through this world. The problem comes not with their existence, but rather with those times when we look at them with the wrong set of eyes. The proverb begins, "Do not let your heart envy sinners . . . " This command would not be given to us if there were not a danger of us doing just that, envying sinners. The whole reason for celebrity magazines is to help mankind to envy sinners. The reason for the old show - "Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous" is to have us envy those who live that way. But the Word of God warns us - don't envy them. What is the counsel we receive from God's Word? Don't envy sinners - don't let your heart be drawn to love what they love - but live in the fear of Jehovah always! Our lives are to be lived in the fear of Jehovah - in the fear of the Lord. How do we do this? We do it by learning wisdom from God's Word - and then allowing the Word to be the primary influence on our desires and direction in life. That Word warns us about the transitory nature of riches - as well as the fact that to whom much is given, much is required. We are warned about sexual immorality in precept and in example. The Word tells us to guard our hearts against the harlot - then gives us a front row seat to the destruction of the strongest man in history by the fleeting lies of free sex - or sex without responsibility. We watch David as he turns from the Word to his own fleshly desires. What seems tantalizing at first becomes a nightmare of lies, deception, and cover-ups later. Then the real price is paid - several times over and literally thousands of times more than his brief pleasure - as daughters are raped, sons die, and an entire nation is thrown into disarray. Yeah - think after watching several episodes of "The Lives of the Judged and Jaded," I think I've been convinced that living in the fear of the Lord always is the better choice! But before we are left with only His judgments to learn from (which actually should be sufficient for us to learn wisdom) we are given a wonderful promise from the Lord Whom we are to fear. When we live in the fear of the Lord - surely there is a future! The word future is so instructive! The word for "future" is "acharith" and it means, "the after-part or the latter end." The Lord is saying to us, "Look at the end of these things! Note and learn from the end of the matter." We are not to focus on the immediate moment when making a decision. Honestly, that is what often gets us in trouble. We look at the chocolate chip cookie sitting on the cookie sheet - wafting out its promise of a "toll-house" moment of pleasure - not realizing the "toll" is higher than we think until we step on the scales. (I know this routine all too well - those cookies call to me like the Sirens of Odysseus) Wisdom is seeing the end from the beginning - to see the consequences ahead of time. When we see them in our mind's eye and heart - we avoid choices that will leave us shipwrecked and without a future. That in the promise - we will have a future - a desired latter-end in life. We'll make choices that may hurt now - but in the end we will be blessed! When we do this we will see that our hope will not be cut off. This is the problem with envying sinners and allowing their short-termed blessing to guide us into making a choice like theirs. We learn only later that the short-termed blessings of sin leave us with long-term problems. There is no long-term hope in sinful actions. There is no future in sin - ask anyone in hell. One last encouragement . . . when sinners flaunt their envious position in the present moment . . . when they try to entice you to join them, don't do it. Don't envy their short-lived adventagious position. They are standing on a fault line of judgment. Sooner or later there is going to be an earthquake from which they cannot escape. Their ground is shifting sand and their house is going to fall. In that moment of temptation remind them of their latter end - man . . . remind yourself of your own latter end if you follow their example. There is a future - a hope. Go to the last book and read of "The Lifestyles of the Happy and Heaven-bound." |
Proverb a DayEach day, we'll take a look at a verse from the chapter of Proverbs for the day. Our hope is to gain wisdom each day - and from that wisdom - to have understanding to make godly decisions in the throes of everyday life. Thank you for visiting our website! Everything on this site is offered for free. If, however, you would like to make a donation to help pay for its continued presence on the internet, you can do that by clicking here. The only thing we ask is that you give first to the local church you attend. Thank you!
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